Jane of all Trades. (Sort of)

I think it is very important to know a little bit about everything. Which is why most of the time, even though I work mostly on my computer, I like to learn how to do some random things occasionally. I know, making butter in a mason jar is something kindergarteners do. But hell, I wanted to do it too. So this month, my random skill I have learned… Is how to make the best fucking butter I have ever tasted. Ever.

First, I started with a large mason jar, and a carton of heavy whipping cream.

Have you ever tasted plain whipping cream? It’s seriously thick. Like 5x’s thicker than milk. My lactose intolerance was already getting nervous about this. The trick to this, is only pouring 1/3 of the way to the top of the jar. that allows the cream to have room to shake.

And now, we shake. Shake. Shake. Shake. Shake. Shake. Shake. Shake. Shake. Shake……………………… and shake some more.

After around 5 minutes of vigorous shaking- the cream started to solidify. It was more of like a yogurtey texture- but was not done yet. You have to wait until the butter separates from the buttermilk. (Can you imagine if you had to chug a jar full of gooey cream? BLARF)

Success! The butter separated from the milk within seconds. I gave it a few more good shakes, just for good measure, and then poured the fatty concoction into a sifter to strain out the excess buttermilk.

Call me Martha Beast- we have butter! It still had some  milk draining out, so a gave it a good squish with a spoon, and then put it all into a smaller jar. You can add salt to it, which I did, and I thought maybe I used too much, but it was ok.

This was by far the best butter I have ever tasted. It was so rich, it actually made one little english muffin half totally satisfying. I suggest this fun little project to anyone who wants to be a little housewifey, crafty, or just wants some better tasting butter. It took me roughly 20 minutes start to finish to pull this off. And if you know me at all, you know I only use my kitchen to open bottles of wine. Cooking ‘aint my thing.